Grumpy Old Nerds

Dear Bioware,

I know we kind of had a fight the last time we talked. You said Dragon Age 2 was great, I said I hated you…then you talked about The Old Republic, and I said go to hell you’ve been working on it for 3 years, I wanted some commitment….and I left you. Sure we saw each other from time to time when I’d play Mass Effect, or Mass Effect 2….but it wasn’t about you. It was about Shep and company. Joint custody of the kids was great. I was moving on with my life. And then I got that email with that magical phrase, “You are invited to test Star Wars The Old Republic”.….damn you and your way with words. I promised myself I wouldn’t fall for your act again, that I knew better….I wasn’t going to let what happened to me in Kirkwall happen again. But that email was just so…damn beautiful! So I played it the first time…a Sith Warrior, with a scar on his face. A scar that represented the scar you left on my heart Bioware…a scar you left on my heart.

Creepy? Oh my yes, but let’s face it, Dragon Age 2? TOTAL disappointment. Hell, I know a certain fellow by the name of Mimic that went on a month-long tirade at the mere mention of that game. We’re talking a full-on Reagan Smash kind of tirade. But when I had the pleasure of taking part in a Beta weekend, I was enamored with this title….and I HATE MMOs. No seriously, ask the others. I have been of the opinion that anyone that takes legitimate joy in a game in this genre is severely and irreparably brain damaged. But this? No no no…this is damn near brilliance in digi-whatsis form. It takes everything I LIKE about real games and puts it in an environment where if you wanted to mingle with sticky human people…you could. But you could also tell them to suckit and you go on your merry way. (I like the suckit option myself). I wanted to tell my chums at Grumpy Old Nerds all about my experience, but due to the NDA at the time, I could not. Looking back though, even if I wanted to…I was so hypnotized by what I was seeing, I am not sure I could have adequately given a description that would do it justice.

So when word came out that not only was I going to get another crack at the Galaxy Far Far Away, A LONGER Time Ago than when George Lucas decided to shit on the franchise….I was ready. When I found out that my friends at Grumpy Old Nerds was going to get to play along with me? I was absolutely EXTATIC. So, if anyone is curious as to why there were no updates on the site until recently….SWTOR and gearing up for it would be why. We meant to do stuff…really we did. But we had SWTOR Fever. Yes it is a real thing. And no it isn’t a rash. So you should probably get that looked at.

For my second go-round, I decided to take on the Jedi Knight as I was a HUGE fan of the Knights of the Old Republic games. So, when I found out that writer extraordinaire, Drew Karpyshyn was responsible for the story of this class, I had to give it a whirl. Now let me preface what I am about to say with before I even got a chance to test the game, I was planning on becoming a Trooper for our guild. Mostly because the “Can we shoot them now?” mentality is pretty much…well…me. However, getting my feet wet with the Knight made me realize that there is no way in hell I can start with any other class for the Republic. The Knight’s story is just too damn good. I am not just saying that, it is outstanding. The further along I went, the more I wanted to experience. I was absolutely dumbfounded when I got to touch down on the wilds of Taris, going through the planet I could make out little pieces of the civilization that was there during the time of KOTOR when I was leading Revan, Bastila, Carth, and Canderous through her streets. Combat with a lightsaber I had figured would seem repetitive and clunky, but somehow the developers managed to make the process engaging nearly every time. There were numerous occasions where I had to remind myself that I was actually playing an MMO. But on to the less glamorous bits….like functionality. I took to the whole MMO process easier than I expected, simply because when I listen to fellows talk about their game experiences, I swear they seem to be speaking in tongues…the urge to drown them in holy water and set them on fire is great, I assure you. As for hardware issues….not to be a dick, but I had none. The machine that I play on was custom built to ensure I would be able to play this thing at the highest level possible. To borrow from former President George W. Bush: “Mission Accomplished”.

I did notice some bugs and glitches in the game that I am sure will be addressed before launch if not shortly after, and the matter of hearing everyone else’s companions run their mouths was more than a little irritating, but all in all this game has ruined any chance of another MMO coming along and convincing me that anything other than SWTOR is worth my time. The bar, she has been raised to a standard that is going to take a lot of work to meet let alone top. Which leads me back to my letter to Bioware….

I just wanted you to know, I forgive you. DA2 never happened as far as I am concerned, and whatever differences we had…we can work them out. I know we can. It is clear to me now that SWTOR is proof that you learned your lesson, and I for one am ready to give you another chance. Just don’t break my heart again. I swear if I see a damn gungan at any point, there will be blood.

Huggles,

Numbspoon